The Rare Divorce

Greetings,

This happened in a country where divorce is seen as failure. A place where the majority of women know their place and stay in it. A place where mothers control and manipulate their daughter's behavior, attitudes and imaginary freedom with a heavy dictatorial hand called love.

She was different.

She told someone she could trust that, after seven months of marriage she'd decided to leave her husband and filed divorce papers.

"I feel so much better," she said when they had a talk. She opened up because she finally felt free, she knew he was a good listener and she had a lot to say. How she'd believed her husband in the beginning.

"He lied to me. He courted me with sweet words and I thought, or believed I thought or thought I believed he had an open mind but I was disappointed because he wasn't honest...so after some time measured in weeks then months I saw his, how do you say, irresponsibility, how he wouldn't contribute his heart to me, to our relationship; and then, when I tried to talk to him he was closed to me, he shut down and I was working and trying to keep the flat up and work on our relationship but I saw it was difficult, then really, really impossible to live with everything in my brain and heart," and she paused.

"Now, when he saw my action to end the marriage he was filled with remorse and regret and apologies. But it's too late. I told him to move out. He returned to his family. He tries to bother me every day in his childlike whining way but it's over. I can handle it. I am strong and know what I want in my life. My family is very supportive of my decision."

"Yes, in China I learned it's always about saving face. Appearances. Here, it's about self respect, growth and personal dignity," said the listener. "Some get it and some don't."

"Yes," she said. "I am not living the lie anymore. I feel free."

"You look great and I am happy for you."

Peace.