julia writes from sweden

(This is an excerpt of a letter Juia wrote to Rita after returning home. It is reprinted with her permission.)

I am writing down the bones. 

I have learned that in Cambodian traffic one relies purely on the force. Which is easier to locate once all the buzzing stops and you start focusing on the right now. If you try to think about anything in the past or in the future you will get hit by at least one month. 

I know, I tried it. Twice. Navigating through the craziest jams becomes easy if you pay complete, relaxed attention. Life is same, same, but different as the tourist t-shirt reads. Mine reads I heart Cambodia. 

I have learned that a land mine costs $3 to put in the ground. A prosthetic limb on average $3000. I have learned that a government-employed teacher in Cambodia earns about $40 a month, a privately employed teacher can earn twice that. 

I have learned that with a little help a family can make some extra money raising butterflies. I have learned that papaya and lime is an awesome combination, that amok is delicious and sweet and sour fish soup is even better, that coconut water is best had out of a newly cracked open coconut after my new friend Mo climbs up the tree to get it for me, that Angelina has good taste in drinks and that Chin's mom can cook a fantastic feast on a nail. 

I have learned that I can be useful and that I am needed. My life is no longer an empty search for anything to hold on to. My purpose has found me. 

I am grateful I decided to go to Cambodia. 

I am grateful I went despite second thoughts. I am grateful to all the beautiful, inspiring, wonderful people I got to meet there. I am grateful that I could be of service. I am grateful for the lessons I learned. I am grateful that this happened at a time in my life when I am open to change. I am grateful that I am out of the dark. My life is the light and I am living it intentionally. All the rest is just details. I'll fill you all in when inspiration finds me. Take care, Rita.

fascinating

You are an object of endless fascination and speculation, said Orphan.

A stranger among strangers alive and well singing a blues song about disorientation, the unfolding process, dynamic. You are a ghost. People here see them before now later. 1.7 million to be exact.

Fear and superstition.

They pray to dead soul spirits because they are afraid of the dead. And it's theoretically possible to say local people have an EI or Emotional Intelligence of -7. This simple truth or unpleasant fact is revealed through behavior, attitudes and verbal communication. It’s a lack of maturity.

Zero personal individual incentive, initiative and growth.

It has nothing to do with culture, families, chance, fate, destiny, education or life social skills. I witnessed the same reality teaching in China, said Orphan, a survivor of Gulag #101.

Should living and learning come before teaching, wondered Orphan. Everyone is a student on peace street where life’s lessons are small and magnificent, said Elf.

There are book smarts and street smarts, said Orphan.

Children are a tool, said a wealthy Chinese man in Laos. He had 2.

one leg

yes, said orphan, let's fly away.

elf agreed, after a month playing with spontaneous five-year young experts. 

where shall we go?

it's a small planet.

how about cambodia, we know it well.

ok. 9 months in laos learning, laughing, loving, sharing was a joy.

on fool's day they arrived in siem reap. a hustler showed up. i am poor. i need money for my family.

i remember this story, said elf.

it's an old one, said orphan. 

let's go see friends.

they walked into a gritty world, surrounded by empty glass and brass hotels.

children scavaged trash.

they passed a one legged man on crutches. what happened to him, asked elf.

he stepped on a land mine while planting rice.

31 flavored daze

yes, exclaimed elf, we made it through march. march was a real adventure.

what did you do, queried weary bleary eyed orphan. 

oh, i had so much fun with the kids, like us. they were young curious playful energetic experiental wild and free.

that's a long verbal sentence, laughed orphan.

life is a long laughing sentence, said elf.

can we go out to play now, asked orphan.

yes, let's take the day off and be creative, said elf.

please give me a hug, said orphan, people need five hugs a day for emotional well being.

elf hugged orphan.

orphan hugged elf.

mi & mo

orphan said to elf, who's the girl with the rose?

mi. she's a black h'mong girl living in remote mountainous sapa, vietnam. she sells hand embroidered work on the street.

the street of dreams? asked orphan. more like mean life blues street, said elf.

she looks happy. 

she is. we should all be so happy.

she and mo her friend met a stranger. they played, laughed and sang together.

it was winter. they shared delicious noodle soup in the market. the girls rent a room with other kid street sellers for $20 a month. they are tough survivors.

their village is far away. like a dream.

do they go to school?

what's a school? their education is on the street. like a dream.

i love the rose.

yes, it's beautiful. everything we love dies. 

do you learn that in school? 

it's something you learn by yourself.

i see.